How the Checklist Works
Go through 290 items across 21 categories — from sensory play to power exchange, role play to aftercare preferences. For each item, rate your interest on a 5-tier scale. Add notes. Mark items as Give, Receive, Both, or Watch. Toggle experience level.
When you're done, share a comparison link with a partner. The system shows you a green/yellow/red matrix: where you overlap, where you differ, and what's off the table for either of you. No awkward guessing. Just clarity.
The 5-Tier Rating Scale
🔴
Hard Limit
Not under any circumstances
🟠
Soft Limit
Hesitant — specific context only
🟡
Curious
Interested but haven't tried
🟢
Enjoy
Something you like doing
💜
Favorite
A top interest — enthusiastically yes
The Polywise Compatibility Matrix
The comparison feature is what makes this checklist different from a list you find elsewhere. Once both partners complete their checklists, the matrix view shows every item with a color that tells you instantly where you stand:
Compatibility Colors
Mutual Interest
Both of you are curious, enjoy, or love it
Mismatch — Talkable
Different tiers, but no hard limits
Hard Limit on One Side
Off the table — respect and move on
Your individual responses stay private. The comparison only shows overlap, not each other's raw scores. Designed so neither partner feels pressured to reveal more than they're comfortable with.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a kink checklist?
A kink checklist is a structured list of activities and interests you rate based on your interest level. It helps you understand your own desires and compare them with partners before trying new things — reducing awkwardness and increasing consent clarity.
How does the partner comparison feature work?
Once both partners complete the checklist, the comparison view shows a color-coded matrix: green for mutual interest, yellow for mismatched but compatible, and red for hard limits. You only see overlap where both people are open — no pressure, no awkward reveals.
What's the difference between a hard limit and a soft limit?
A hard limit is non-negotiable — something you won't do under any circumstances. A soft limit is something you're hesitant about but might consider in specific contexts. The 5-tier scale gives you much more nuance than just yes/no.
Is this checklist only for BDSM?
No. It covers power exchange, bondage, and D/s dynamics, but also sensory play, role play, exhibitionism, impact play, and many other types of kink. It's designed for anyone exploring their desires.
Is the checklist private?
Yes. Your checklist is private by default. You share it only when you generate a comparison link to send to a specific partner — nothing is public.